FUTURE

I will go to Germany with my girlfriend. Let’s say her name is Karoline. She is amazing and I love her. I want to live so I can experience all these emotions that are important to me. I want to make her happy. I want her to be happy. I want her to feel the same way I feel about her. I know she loves me and that is soooo good of a feeling that I can’t ask for more in life. But I should ask for more. I should ask for me to be happy. I should ask for me to be fulfilled. I should ask for me to be better and not have anxiety or suicidal ideations. But because I don’t believe that other people can help me, I can only help myself. So I have to help me alone. Not fully alone i can take other’s help, but I have to do it myself. I should decide that I want to change. That I deserve to change that I worthy of changing. I am worthy of getting better and I am worthy of being happy. I want to see Vienna with her I want to see parts of Germany that I have never seen before with her. I want to spend Christmas day with her. I want to hold her. I want to tell her each day how much I love her.